NAKED BODIES, BIRTHDAY GIFTS AND CELEBRITIES

Yesterday, the internet was abuzz with naked pictures of pregnant Blac Chyna, [fiancée to Rob Kardashian] as well as the semi-naked picture of Karrueche Tran, Chris Brown’s former girlfriend. The pictures, as can be expected, provoked all sorts of reactions ranging from comments of admiration to those of irritation and disgust.

For me, however, those pictures provoked a mental trip down memory lane to how far the world has come. There was a time in the 1800s when people’s outfits generally looked like this:

Centuries later, the story has changed. People evolved from being fully clothed to being partially clothed, and now you can even walk around semi-naked if you wish. It all depends on the country you live in.

Basically there are three types of people who don’t see anything wrong or strange in showcasing their nudity for the world to see.

Type A: People who are rebelling against society in general and religion in particular. Most times such people have had terrible religious experiences in the past and so their own way of getting back against religion is to rebel against it. Such people love pushing and encouraging others to push moral boundaries.

Type B: Those who feel they must pose nude for career sake, e.g acting and music. The demands of the modern day acting job seem to be such that actors and actresses must be prepared to play any role, including nude ones. Hmmm…..

Type C:  People who like posing naked because it makes them feel sexy and powerful. They like the power they wield over those who drool over their naked body, even if it’s just temporary.

It should be stated that type B and C people are subsets of type A. However, whatever category a person may belong to, one thing is clear: all three types of people are in search of one form of fulfillment or the other. But at what price? For the boundary pusher, it is quite clear that there comes a time when there are no longer any boundaries to push. The evolving of the female attire over the years is a very good example. First, there was the era of the total cover up; when women covered themselves from head to toe for modesty’s sake. Centuries later, women rebelled against such clothing. Necklines became steeper and hemlines shorter. Shorts became shorts in the real sense of the word. Bikinis replaced one piece bathing suits for the most part. But then a curious thing happened, and is still happening. These various stages of rebellion did not bring the satisfaction expected; rather it only brought a craving to break more boundaries, because human wants and desires are insatiable. Enter the era of nakedness. Many celebrities like Kim Kardashian, Amber Rose, Jennifer Aniston, etc, posed naked for various magazine covers in an effort to destroy all boundaries. So the question is…what now? We’ve seen Kim Kardashian et al naked. *yawn* Next one please!  

And this is the problem with destroying boundaries: it often promises a fulfillment that it cannot deliver. No matter how voluptuous a person’s body may be, there will always be someone else even more voluptuous…and there will always be people who are disgusted at the sight of naked people on magazines or TV. So either way, it’s a lose-lose situation. You may please some people by posing naked but eventually your body holds no appeal for them even if you remain perpetually naked, and you put off other people.

This is an appeal to the present- day woman: there are few things as admirable as a strong, feminine, confident, and MYSTERIOUS woman. A woman who knows that she has power, but who chooses not to abuse it. A woman who knows that she can drive men crazy if she decides to strip naked today, but who is very aware that there is more to life than men, women and sex, that life is all about adding value to people. And thank God that there are many such women out there, despite the media’s claim to the contrary. They are women who ‘walk like the boss and talk like the boss’ whether they be career women or housewives, and though the media tries to label them as women who are ‘ashamed of their sexuality’, the truth is that they are more in touch with and in control of their own sexuality than those who pose naked for fame, money, or in defiance of religion and society.

A stylishly dressed woman is like a beautifully wrapped birthday gift- You not only love the gift, you also love the excitement of unwrapping it.

I will like to conclude with this analogy: Seeing a naked person on the cover of a magazine or on TV is like being given an unwrapped birthday gift-You sort of wish the person had wrapped it and allowed you the excitement of unwrapping it. It’s also like being given something that everyone else has- you find it difficult to value it. I sometimes wish I could peep into the minds of the spouses of those who have posed naked publicly. How does it feel like knowing that men [or women] around the world have a saved picture or video of their naked spouse? Are they really happy about it as they claim, or are they seething inside with anger and jealousy? Imagine having an actor husband who was naked in one of his films, and then one day you discover that your friend has your husband’s naked picture on her laptop. Some will say ‘as long as people look at my spouse’s body but don’t touch, I’m OK with that’.  I won’t say too much about that except this: Seeing often goes before touching. Doubt me? Go ask Brad Pitt, Simon Cowell, and all others who have been unfaithful to their wives or betrayed their best friends. They will confirm my statement.

KISSED THE GIRLS AND MADE THEM CRY: Why Women Lose When They Give In (Author: Lisa Bevere)

For a couple of weeks, I've heard and read things pertaining to feminism- especially in the area of sexuality.

Some feminists advocate that women should have sexual freedom, just like men. That they should be free to have sex with whoever they want, whenever they want.

I read a book (title above) several years ago that answered these arguments and so, I went again to the store to buy my second copy. Since the book is quite solid, I’ve decided to give an overview by way of clips and summaries of the beautiful thoughts the author shared. Enjoy!

We (women) believed the lie that sexual promiscuity- freedom to have sex with whoever, whenever- would set us free; but ultimately, it is women who suffer the most when the laws of love are desecrated.

No matter how far you have gone, it is a lie to feel that because you have compromised sexually in the past, you no longer have the right to say NO.

Your ability to inspire lust in men by the way you dress, speak or act is not equal to personal empowerment. The guys don’t want you for yourself; they simply want to relieve themselves of sexual tension, and you look available to help them.

Wake up! Where is the power sexual freedom for women promises? We are not winning. We are being conquered! Where is your honour, dignity, strength?

As women, we desire more than sexual release. We crave intimacy, romance and passion. We want to know and be known… but men are not interested in knowing more thoroughly and intimately, those they have known too quickly (by way of sex), no matter how many movies may suggest otherwise.
Culture says you are either a nice, weak, compliant female or a strong, aggressive, sexually free woman. But there are other options! There is a higher and more powerful way for women to adorn themselves: honour, mystery, strength, dignity, insisting on being treated with respect and accepting nothing less. Men do not want to attack and conquer such women; they want to be worthy of her.
Promiscuity gives women the freedom to behave sexually like men but the truth is, regardless of how we behave, we will never be men so why should we act like them?

'Indeed in all the promises made to us about our ability to achieve freedom and independence as women, the promise of sexual emancipation may have been the most illusory. These days, certainly, it is the one most brutally learned. All the sexual bravado a girl may possess evaporates the first time a boy she truly cares for makes it clear that he has no further use for her after his own body has been satisfied. No amount of feminist posturing, no amount of reassurances that she doesn’t need a guy like that anyway, can protect her from the pain and humiliation of those awful moments after he’s gone, when she’s alone and feeling not sexually empowered but discarded.'
Danielle Crittenden, What our Mothers Didn’t Tell Us (New York: Touchstone, 1999), 31.


This ends my summary of the author's thoughts. Of course, this is a very brief overview so it will be of greater benefit to get the book yourself. Michelle Hammond Mckinney's Secrets of an Irresistible Woman is also an excellent read on this subject.

In conclusion, I will like to add that this is not just about waiting till you walk the aisle before giving yourself sexually to a man. It’s far more.


For many ladies, we desperately need to find out our purpose in life. We need to embrace ourselves, discover who we are: quirks, ticks and all. We need to get busy with life: pursuing our dreams, developing skills and getting busy being useful to ourselves and others. In summary, adding value to ourselves.

Then when Mr … comes, we will be well developed to answer the important questions of whether he is worth spending a lifetime with... and of course, whether he is worth our precious self. 

This piece was written by Geraldine Ofulue, a lawyer, speaker and writer

PARENTING A HYPERACTIVE CHILD

Hyperactive children find it very difficult to sit still and obey orders and this trait of course, can be maddening to parents and educators alike. They usually exhibit certain characteristics such as:

• Disorganization: they tend to be scattered and sometimes untidy
• They are easily distracted and thus tend to leave projects undone or half-done
• They are impulsive speakers and sometimes speak without tact
• They have difficulty sleeping and often engage in dangerous activities that put them in physical danger.

Tips for effective handling of the children:

1.      Don’t take things too personal-remember they are not out to intentionally frustrate you.

2.      See the child as someone with strengths and weaknesses, just like other children. No child is perfect.

3.      Seek support. Don’t try to do it alone. Always remember - there are many parents out there with hyperactive children like yours who are successfully dealing with it. Seek out other parents in schools, church groups, etc for ideas on how to cope with hyperactivity in your child.

4.      Chart a daily routine for meals, homework, play, etc and stick to it. Remember they need help learning to be organized, and sticking to a schedule will help them do just that.

5.      Set clear rules and expectations with the child. Reward positive behaviour with praises and encouragement [avoid giving material rewards such as sweets as much as possible]. Also spell out consequences for bad behaviour and be sure to follow through.

6.      Engage the child in physical activities like sports to help release some of the excess energy. This will also help to improve mental alertness and concentration.

7.      Ensure the child gets adequate sleep. Try to reduce the time he/she spends watching television as excessive viewing of television encourages hyperactivity.

8.      Avoid sugary snacks in his/her diet. Healthy meals given regularly will do fine.

9.      Help your child make friends with other children. One way of doing this is to invite one or two friends over to the house on a regular basis and watch them while they interact. Enforce certain rules such as no hitting, pushing or shoving while playing

10.  Commit your child into the hands of God on a regular basis.

Are you a parent or an educator who handles hyperactive children on a regular basis? Please share your experiences with the children and how you handle it so others can benefit.

FIVE WAYS OF IDENTIFYING HUMAN TRAFFICKERS

Osas, a 20 year old girl from the Southern part of Nigeria, was delighted when her distant relation fulfilled her promise to take her abroad. Like many girls from poor families, she was immediately handed over to ‘aunty Joy’ without indepth probing from her parents, for they believed that their daughter was safe in the hands of this distant relation on her father’s side, and also, the less mouths to feed, the better.

Imagine Osas’s surprise when, on getting to Italy, she was housed in a small, dingy room with ten other young girls like her and asked to bathe and change for work. Her surprise turned to shock when work turned out to be sleeping with men for money that she never saw. It was then it dawned on her…she was now a prostitute in a foreign country with no hope of getting out.

Osas is not alone in this experience. Many people both male and female have been promised a better future by people they trusted, only to find themselves sold as sex slaves. Brad Riley, founder of  iEmpathize, a youth empowerment organization that combats crimes against children, shares five characteristics that a human trafficker could have: 

1 - Pretender -- Someone who pretends to be something s/he is not, such as a boyfriend, a big sister, a father, etc.

2 - Provider -- Someone who offers to take care of an individual's needs, such as for clothes, food, a place to live, etc or their wants, like cool cell phones, purses, parties, etc.

3 - Promiser -- Someone who promises access to great things, like an amazing job, a glamorous lifestyle, travel, etc.

4 - Protector -- Someone who uses physical power or intimidation to protect (but also control) an individual.

5 - Punisher -- Someone who uses violence and threats to control an individual. When the previous disguises have been exhausted, an exploitative person often becomes a Punisher to maintain control.

picture courtesy: edition. cnn. com

Some of these girls are actually branded with codes, names, etc, to identify them as belonging to a particular trafficker or pimp.

So, the next time a distant ‘relation’ or benefactor comes to you promising all sorts of goodies in exchange for your child, please take time to do an in-depth investigation before handing over your child. While there are still honest people out there who genuinely want to help other people's children, there are also others who only wish to make a fortune at the expense of other people. May God save us all.

MAN FAILS IN ATTEMPT TO ATTACK CATHOLIC CHURCH IN INDONESIA

A priest in a Catholic church in Medan, Indonesia, was yesterday stabbed by a man pretending to be a worshipper in the church. While the priest was giving the sermon, people heard what sounded like a firecracker and saw the man rushing towards the priest with his backpack on fire. He was only able to stab the priest’s arm however, before he was pinned down by the congregation. Luckily the firecracker did not explode but only fumed. A symbol indicating support for the Islamic State was found on the attacker.

Thank God the attempt failed. However, the onus is still on churches round the world to be as vigilant as possible and on the look-out would-be attackers. May God continue to save His own.

BOOK REVIEW

ADULT BOOKS

FICTION: BRIDGE TO HAVEN

Bridge to Haven is a novel written by Francine Rivers. It is the story of a woman who was abandoned as an infant and adopted by a couple. However, unable to accept love from the family and the community, she eloped with a smooth talker to the city and got introduced to the glamour of acting and Hollywood where she discovered that not all that glitters is gold……

I don’t want to spoil the surprise for those yet to read the book, but believe me, this is Francine Rivers at her best, and one of the good things about the book is that it does not contain graphic sexual descriptions thus making it appropriate for adults and teenagers alike. 

NON-FICTION: DESTINY

Destiny is a book written by T.D Jakes and released in 2015. In the book, the beloved pastor and author encourages readers to know their purpose and act on their instinct, as these will lead a person into his or her destiny. He also teaches about prioritizing and focussing on one’s purpose, as well as the power of rest in achieving destiny. All-in-all, the book is a definite must-read for those interested in maximizing their potential.

CHILDREN’S BOOK : BRUME AND THE CLIQUE

Brume and the clique is a book written by Jane Agunabor and published by Lantern books [Literamed publications]. It is a story about an adopted boy and his adventures with his new siblings, such as foiling a kidnapping attempt and dealing with bullies in his school. The book is good for children between the ages of 8 to 12 as its vocabulary is challenging enough; neither too easy nor too difficult. It is a definite must-read for parents who wish to develop their children’s vocabulary.

A DISGRACED PASTOR, PITT- JOLIE-ANISTON, AND HUMAN SEXUALITY

Some weeks ago a pastor in Asaba, Delta State was caught having sex with a married female member of his church. He was stripped and made to parade the streets carrying his church banner. Now some of us might be yawning and saying –‘so what’s new’? while others may have executed judgement on the pastor in particular and on men of God in general. But before we dismiss the incident as just one of those things, we will do well to extract lessons from it.

It is imperative that we all keep in mind the fact that people get sexually attracted to other people for different reasons, top reasons being physical attractiveness, charisma, money, power and influence. But many times, we subconsciously think that beauty is the main reason for sexual attraction and forget the other factors. If you have charisma or wield influence in any way, such as by being one of the leaders in a religious or business organization, or if you are a success in one endeavour or another, or if you seem to be unattainable [e.g you’re married, in a committed relationship, etc], then you must know that there is at least one person out there [apart from your beloved] who is sexually attracted to you, if not a legion of people. Success is sexy and to think otherwise is to engage in self deception.

So what does this mean for readers out there who suspect, or know, that someone has ‘the hots for them’? Well…nothing, if you don’t have a reputation to guard or a relationship to protect. But if you do think that something inappropriate is [almost] happening between yourself and someone else who is not your beloved, and you cherish your reputation, your relationships and your followership, then you will do all in your power to make sure that you do not engage in an activity that will see you one day on the streets of Asaba parading naked for your followers and family to see. You will take proactive measures to make sure you don’t ‘find yourself by yourself, with your hands up’ as Tuface Idibia once sang.

 I will not try to prescribe what to do or what not to do, but I will say this: For those who care about their marital relationship and who pray never to indulge in adultery, please pray on, but also keep in mind the fact that self deception is at the root of most adulterous affairs, that is, a refusal to admit the fact that we are all weak human beings at the core and no one is superhuman no matter how highly placed they may be. It is also the refusal to admit that one could easily be attracted to another human being who is not their spouse, given the right place, time and circumstances.

A case in point- They usually say that actors & actresses who engage in French kissing and sexual activity during filming are just being professional-there is nothing to it, everything ends after the acting. Well, I used to believe this too... until Brad Pitt kissed Angelina Jolie in the movie ‘Mr and Mrs Smith’ and Jennifer Aniston [his wife then] became toast... then I realised: we all, including actors and actresses, are human. Each time a man kisses a woman who is not his wife, even if they claim to be acting, we could just be seeing the next Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie- and wifey at home just may be the next Jennifer Aniston. So, you don’t want to be the next Asaba pastor or be involved in a sort of Pitt-Jolie-Aniston triangle? Then (1) Be honest with yourself (2) Be honest with your spouse and let him/her know when that lady-in-red or man-in-tuxedo gives you even as little as a wink.

I am Lauretta Ani, and I’m just keeping it real.

MOTHERS OF YOUNG CHILDREN………..LIVES OF QUIET DESPERATION…OR NOT?

A few years ago I boarded a cab with a woman carrying two young children. After settling down I pulled out my phone and soon got lost in the happenings around the world, that is, until I heard a knock and a scream. I looked up in surprise only to see the older child [not more than 5 years by the way], holding a part of his face and crying, with the woman screaming invectives at him. I remember thinking to myself: ‘This woman surely cannot be the boy’s mother. Probably she’s just his guardian or something. A real mother cannot hit a little child like this’

Fast-forward to the present, and I have had to rethink my thoughts. While I still cannot understand how a mother could hit her little child like that, I have come to the conclusion that many mothers of young children are living lives of quiet desperation and don’t know who to turn to, and unless you have actually been a parent or had cause to take care of little children even if for just a month, it’s difficult to understand the frustration that a mother of young children can feel. For the sake of those who may not have an idea; let me give you a hint of it.

Today, as soon as my feet hit the ground, I heard the words- ‘I am hungry’ coming from one of the children. I asked what they wanted to eat and received their orders. Made food and served it, and what did I hear-‘I don’t want to eat this food again. I want so-and-so instead.’ What! Someone might say: ‘You should have allowed them starve. When they are hungry they will eat’. I find that this advice works more with older children than those under age five. So after making breakfast number two, I set about bathing them one after the other. While bathing one child, the other methodically and systematically tore a paper into little bits and scattered them over the living room, so mommy had to sweep-again! Then lunch time. Then settling quarrels and threatening them with sleep if the noise level wasn’t reduced. Then more cries of ‘mommy I’m hungry’. Are you beginning to get the picture? Of course by afternoon mommy already feels stressed, tired, and a feeling of wanting to escape from it all [Thank God for writing therapy].

Things are not always this bad however. There are times when the chatter is delightful. And the smiles exquisite. And truth be told, I have been fortunate to have family members come in at various stages of my ‘mommy-hood’ thus making things a lot easier for me; but I know many women who do not have family members available to help them. And some who can afford nannies but who are wary of them because of the trauma they had previously experienced. And a woman whose husband told her point blank that he would not be held responsible for any sexual liaisons held with the nanny should she decide to bring one in.

I often remember a picture I saw in one of the Lagos State adverts for birth control, in which a woman is carrying a child, backing another one, and holding about two or three little ones. I previously associated the picture with poverty and felt that the advert was targeted more at low income earners, after all, I reasoned, higher income earners would probably have a big car to accommodate those children and transport them around, and no one would be the wiser. But after giving birth and relating with other mothers of young children, I have come to the conclusion that emotional health in addition to financial consideration should be considered when planning families. Especially considering the fact that people no longer live in extended families like before, when there was always an aunt or cousin to look after the children and give mommy some peace and quiet.

I distinctly remember one day when my son was still a baby, during a period when I had no one with me except hubby, [and hubby had gone to work that day]; how my son cried and cried and was inconsolable. And all of a sudden I felt so helpless and harried, I dropped everything and started weeping as well. I laugh at myself now when I remember the incident, but the crying was actually very therapeutic for me [and it turned out that he just wanted to sleep, but I didn’t know that then]. I often think of mothers with as many as four young children, especially those with children whose age difference is a year or less- how do they cope, especially if they have no helper? How many of them are silently crying out for help, but no one seems to hear? [Worse still, instead of being helped, some mothers find themselves being judged by others, especially those without the experience of taking care of little children, or those who had it easy all through].

Is there a way to help such mothers? I was surprised to find on the Internet that some organizations, especially religious establishments, do have outfits dedicated solely to helping young mothers. I find that admirable and commendable indeed. I, on my part, have decided to do what my own mom did when I was younger- and that is to periodically bring home a young child for a day or two, or even a weekend; not because I particularly love little children [Ok that was just a joke], but so as to give a young mother a little time to herself. Trust me, some mothers hardly have even an hour to themselves, not to talk of a day. And here’s a shout out to all who have ever helped a mother of young children-God bless you all. You have been of help in indescribable ways.

So, how about you? How do you plan to help a mom today?

FAMILY, RELIGION AND QANDEEL BALOCH

Some weeks ago, the world awoke to the news that Qandeel Baloch, the Pakistani model, had been murdered by her brother to protect the honour of her family [honour-killing]. The news got me reeling. I thought of my own brother and my close knit family, the trust and the closeness. I couldn’t help wondering about the kind of family Qandeel grew up in, as well as the relationship dynamics in her family. I also couldn’t help but replay the crime scene in my head. The fact that Qandeel entered the car with her brother meant that there was an element of trust at least; the probability that she was forced to enter the vehicle is quite low. So she entered this vehicle simply because she trusted her brother to some extent-and got stabbed in the back-or strangled as the case may be.

Traditionally, a family should be a safe haven especially for children but sadly, this seems not to be so especially in these times, and so many factors are responsible for it.

If we consider the influence of religion on the family, one can safely say without equivocation that religion has had both a good and bad influence on the family. While most religions claim to recognize the importance of a strong family system to the society, I daresay that many merely pay lip service to that claim and barely put their money where their mouth is, so to speak. In certain religions, for example, you don’t need to have clairvoyant powers to detect that while male children are celebrated by its adherents, females, both adults and children, seem to exist for the sole purpose of catering to the needs of the males in the household. Other than that, they seem to have little or no purpose for even existing in the first place. And it is in such a setting that Qandeel was raised.

Some parts of Christendom have also joined the onslaught against the family, but in a different way altogether. Taking Christ’s words out of context [‘A man’s enemies shall be the members of his own household’], they have resorted to prophesying to people with such words like-‘your father/mother/wife/husband/ etc, is behind your misfortune in life’. While in extremely few cases such prophecies may be true, majority of them are misleading and simply prey on the ‘victim’s’ need to find someone to blame for his/her misfortune. Harsh but true. It is imperative that one should carefully consider the wise course of action to take with such prophecies and be not hasty in branding the accused a ‘witch/wizard’.

I would like to conclude with this short scene from Chinua Achebe’s novel ‘Things Fall Apart’. In the story, a sacrifice needs to be made, and Okonkwo’s adopted son, Ikemefuna, has been earmarked as the sacrificial lamb- with Okonkwo pinpointed as the slaughterman. At this point, one of the villagers visits Okonkwo and makes a profound statement to him that I believe is highly instructional to us all in the present. The man says to Okonkwo-“That boy calls you father. Do not have a hand in his death”. Sad to say that Okonkwo did not heed the man’s advice and eventually killed Ikemefuna to avoid being thought of as weak, and eventually he himself did not die in a good way. In the Holy Bible, after Cain killed his brother Abel, the Lord said to him-‘what have you done? The blood of your brother is crying out from the ground………..from now on you will be a homeless wanderer on the earth’.  Both in nature and in religion, the curse of a lack of peace seems to follow those who betray the trust of a family member and cause harm to them. I would therefore like to end with the words of the villageman: That person calls you daddy/mommy/son/daughter/uncle/aunty, etc…do not have a hand in their death.

Bob Marley, Originality and the West

Hubby and I recently went to an event, and one of the high points of the event occurred when music legends Majek Fashek and Ras Kimono took the stage. It was a time of mixed feelings for me. I started listening to the music of both men right from when I was a little girl as my dad played their music quite a lot. Now, seeing the men live on stage singing timeless songs [in an age where songs that do little or nothing to stimulate one’s mental faculties are being churned out on a per second basis] thrilled me in ways that are indescribable.

It was the musician, Faze, who sang: ‘originality, na we own the society’. I saw that being played out before my eyes that evening. Long after musicians like Majek Fashek and Ras Kimono are gone, their songs will still continue to thrill generations to come, whereas in comparison, I predict that songs like ‘all I want is your waist’ and ‘ baby pullover’ will be forgotten by Christmas of this year [if they’ve not been forgotten already].

I was however saddened by Majek Fashek’s general demeanour. Though he gave the audience his best, it was not difficult to notice the effect of hard drugs on his system. The career of this gifted musician was cut short as a result of drug addiction, a habit which is said to have started when he travelled to America. This is part of the reason why I believe Africa in particular needs to fight for the souls of her children. Even while enjoying the positive contributions of the West to us, we will be wise not to take everything they give us hook, line and sinker; but to pass all their offerings through the filter of critical thinking and analysis, so as to determine what will be beneficial to us as a people and what will be harmful to us.

A line in Redemption Song says ‘Emancipate yourself from mental slavery, none but ourselves can free our own minds’. This is a simple but profound statement. In our contemporary culture, I see the statement as a clarion call to Africans in general, and Nigerians in particular, to take heed, and not allow ourselves to be enslaved by the mentality of ‘the West is doing it, so it must be right’. One thing that keeps people in mental slavery is not just the refusal to open their minds to newer and broader ways of thinking, but more importantly, the refusal or inability to critically think through and analyse everything we hear, read and watch.

Someone rightly said that before a fence is removed, it is a wise man who will find out why it was there in the first place. It is unfortunate that while Asians try to retain their culture when they travel overseas, some Africans in diaspora even want to forget that they ever came from Africa. They change their names, attires, accents, mode of behaviour, everything in short, all in an effort to become ‘Americanized’ or ‘Briticos’. Ha.I had cause to speak with two of my students at different times. Each one in my encounter with them referred to themselves as an American or a British citizen. Well, I used the opportunity to give them a little lesson in history, as someone once said that the only thing worse than nostalgia is amnesia. I let them know that while it was okay to claim their foreign citizenship, [as of course there are many doors such claims would open that might not ordinarily have otherwise opened], it would be in their best interests to remember that they are not just American/British citizens, but Nigerians as well. When push comes to shove in a foreign country, the land of your ancestors will always be there to welcome you home.

In conclusion, let us critically examine every message we receive especially from the media, regarding cultural issues such as the training of children and morality, as they are not always right.

Welcome!

Hello everyone,
I am Lauretta Ani, a daughter, sister, wife, mom, educator and a writer. I titled my blog 'Keeping it real' because I write things as I see them. Thank you for visiting, and please write your comments in the comment section, I'd love to hear from you! You can also email me at keepingitrealwithlaurettaani@gmail.com